Hello John, got a new motor?
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Jan 252012
| Yup, pretty much what my house looks like. Well, minus the nanny and gorgeous Victorian decor…. |
Have been feeling a bit blue the last few days – not helped by the hideous weather which makes you want to batten down the hatches and make more tea. I am fed up with the endless rounds of washing up, laundry and meals to make. Where’s Mary Poppins and her magic snapping fingers when you need her? Imagine…if you could just click your fingers and all the crap strewn around the house flew to where it should be. Some people have such magic in their households, but I believe this magic is known as ‘having a cleaner’.
I picked up the new car today, which cheered me up. I no longer feel like I am driving around in a death-trap with a radio that turns itself on ad hoc and drains the battery. As I drove back from the garage, I smiled at the pristine interior and gleaming paintwork. Within half an hour it was filled with three car seats and a spare potty. By the end of the day it will be christened with sweet wrappers, biscuit crumbs, milk sploshes and mud. By the end of the week there will be rogue cola cubes stuck down the side of the handbrake*, footprints kicked into the back of my seat and hedgerow scratches along the doors. And the illusion of ‘girl about town motor’ will be shattered and replaced with ‘harassed mother who is running late motor’. I do keep a roll of M&S; rosemary scented bin bags in the car (yes, such things do exist – only in M&S;!). And I have even been known to utilise them from time to time. Usually when killing time in the school car park. It’s that or I pretend to look terribly officious on my iphone when really I am playing Bejeweled or on Twitter.
| Alas, not my rear. |
This morning I posted out ten ‘Aren’t I marvellous, please employ me’ letters to some local schools. Not expecting much to come of it but at least I feel proactive, which in interview is always one of my ‘strengths’. I never know what to say for my ‘weaknesses’. How are you supposed to respond to that question? What are you rubbish at? In the past I have come out with some guff about ‘not being very good at delegation’ which is really spin saying I’m a bit of a perfectionist and I don’t think anyone can do it to my standards. (This is true, by the way). I do think this sounds a bit up myself (I’m really not), but I can’t really tell them the truth. My weaknesses? I loathe marking and put it off to the absolute last minute, I’m frequently late to assembly and I encourage the kids to question their parents’ ethics. Not sure that would swing me the job. I maintain, honesty is not always the best policy. Whoever came out with that theory had clearly never been asked ‘Does my bum look big in this?’ The answer is NO. Without hesitation or even looking to check. Lie. Always. Fact.
*I admit, the cola cubes are mine.
5 Responses to “Hello John, got a new motor?”
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Where's the picture of the car – pristine version – or is that too late!
We have softmints in our handbreak. Hubby's… We also have the obligatory taped up wing mirror and dents on the bonnet from a cyclist.. who I swear is fine! It was a mutual accident. Also, our car goes mouldy in the foot wells. It's a nice touch I feel…
Your whole post made me smile, but I loved the final paragraph. As a primary teacher (currently on a career break) I know exactly what you mean, but really – how many teachers DO like marking? Secretly, I bet the interviewers would be nodding to themselves at that answer. I was asked how I would make myself a part of the "team" in a school. My response? "What, other than take in a packet of biscuits?" I got the job.
Good luck with the car. If you work out how to keep it clean & tidy, do share.
Love this blog- totally identify with messy house, messy car. I'm off to look for those rosemary scented bin bags tomorrow too!
Alex – There was mould in the car I traded in! Husband said 'What did you do about the mould?' 'I just scuffed it in' said I, 'but you should have seen what was under the car sear!' Bleugh!
Gaelic Mum – love the biscuit idea! If I ever get an interview, might just turn up with a packet of chocolate hobnobs. That ought to do it!
Emma – M&S; also do scented loo roll. *mind boggles*